Passion and Responsibility – How do you choose one?

I am writing this after getting a reality check from my mother regarding my choice between passion and responsibility.

What’s a reality check you may ask? A reality check is when you get to see things as they actually stand in the real world sans any sugarcoating to massage your ego. It’s purpose- is to show you the true reflection of where you are in life.

And when it’s regarding the battle between your passion and responsibility, then you know that – shit’s serious.

CHOICES – THE BUILDING BLOCKS OF LIFE

I’m assuming our lives aren’t perfect. At no stage does life give us the cushion of NOT choosing between two things and just doing what we want without any consequences.

In fact life’s always about choice. You are constantly choosing. Should I –

• go watch a movie or should I stay at home?
• spend time with friends or family?
• order this thing now or should I just wait for it’s price to fall further and then buy it?
• go to the gym and work on myself or just be content with my body image and not pay heed to body shaming bullies?

It’s always a choice. The toughest choice, however, is the one between your passion and responsibility.

Imagine having to choose between doing what you love and doing what’s practically necessary. If, for you, they’re one & the same, then congratulations.

But if, like me, you too are in a dilemma of what to do – so that you’re happily pursuing your passion & at the same time aren’t under the guilt of running away from your responsibility, then this article is for you.

I’m sure you like to travel, most of us do. Generating the money for travel though isn’t always easy. It isn’t a bed of roses where we’re inheriting millions and can do whatever we want.

Life isn’t a movie with a fairy tale ending where you risk everything, put all your eggs in one basket and succeed. It’s about choices. Life throws challenges at you.

PASSION AND RESPONSIBILITY – UNDERSTANDING THROUGH MY STORY

Let me help you understand how to choose between your passion and responsibility or at least how to have a mindset to deal with the situation by telling you my story.

I, Vaibhav Mehta am a single child to my parents. Basically, I am that entitled asshole who’s never had to share his clothes, toys, bags, shoes, pizza, car etc. Feels good to be the apple, no, no, no,  the entire fruit basket of my parents’ eyes.

Since I’ve always had my way, I felt I can just go pick a career of my choice and do what I want to. And I have.

I am an actor with an immense love for travel so I’m trying to juggle this supposedly impossible (as people have told me) combination of acting & travel-blogging.

My parents, however, have completely supported and encouraged me every step of the way to be the best version of myself. I feel blessed to have them and wish that every kid gets parents like them. It’s challenging though.

A regular day involves – managing my travel profile on Instagram, creating a blog post on time, creating Instagram stories to keep the Instagram followers engaged, learning about the business of travel-blogging so that I have a sustainable source of income from it, running around for auditions, working out to stay in shape, facing failure & rejection on a regular basis.

But I’m keeping at it because I am passionate about it and hopefully in the future, will reach my goals and make my parents proud.

But currently I am in the middle of nowhere. I have returned from Dubai after having worked there as a lead actor in a Bollywood musical for 2 years.

During my stay there, I travelled in the annual leaves I got from work & explored another side of me. A side that was so full of wanderlust that I’d start planning my next travel destination before I took a flight to the current one.

After covering 9 countries in a year while working on the project, I felt that it gave me a new perspective as an actor. It wasn’t a hindrance but a pathway to a new outlook towards acting. And just like that, a traveller was born in me.

I’ve had a penchant for writing previously and my Pulitzer award nominee aunt suggested me to start blogging after having seen my exploits on facebook in the form of my status updates.

So, a travel blog became an executable possibility. Isn’t it amazing how one thing leads to another and you suddenly explore that you can do so much more!

That being said, I have no acting work in hand currently. My instagram travel page doesn’t earn me anything as of yet & I have just started blogging & working on my travel website. Basically I have zero income for now.

Can’t rest back on my Dubai savings as they won’t last me a lifetime. And my self-respect & pride don’t allow me to ask money from my parents. Dad’s a self-made businessman who has slogged hard to be where he is. Again, in this case, I have zero knowledge of his business or how he manages it.

Though he hasn’t told me bluntly, I know he wants me to work with him, share his burden, learn the tricks of the trade and carry forward his business having a stable source of income & I don’t blame him for that.

He’s right in his place. He’s struggled so much, given me & my mum a comfortable lifestyle that has allowed me the luxury to choose what I want to do and fall back on him if I fail.

That gives him the right to expect something from me & that too for my own good.

I, on the other hand am stuck between managing acting & travel-blogging. The scales are evenly balanced between passion and responsibility for now.

This balancing act already seems like a gargantuan task even though I’m not giving auditions everyday or trying to get an acting job currently & just solely concentrating on setting up my travel website.

Imagine having to go to office and learn how to manage dad’s business in the middle of all of this. Too much on my plate, isn’t it? So what should I do then?

SHOULD I GIVE UP ACTING?

– No. I don’t think I’ll survive another day if I don’t wake up with the zeal to entertain people. It’s my childhood dream. Acting makes me feel alive. I’m a people-pleaser by choice. Performing is in my DNA. It’s like asking the lion to give up meat & go vegan.

SHOULD I GIVE UP TRAVELLING?

– I can’t, because I feel I am a world citizen. I feel at home everywhere. Travelling humbles me. Shows me my true place as to how little I matter in the larger scheme of things.

Keeps my ego in check. It widens my perspective, rejuvenates, educates, inspires and motivates me to become a better person.

SHOULD I NOT LEARN TO MANAGE DAD’S BUSINESS?

– That’s possible. Yes. My parents won’t force me to join the family business as they’re liberal and supportive. But it’s a selfish, self-centered me speaking.

I can’t forget that it’s his business which has given me the money to survive myself during my struggle in Mumbai as an actor – paying my rent, bills & other expenses before Dubai happened.

My dad sometimes, jokingly says – “What if I die tomorrow? Do you even know where have I invested our money? What if people come upto you and say that you owe them money, even though you don’t?

Imagine acting/travel-blogging not giving you the desired income to continue the lifestyle you’re currently living. What’ll you do then? How will you support this dream of acting & travelling if you don’t have money in the first place?”

MY TAKEAWAY FROM THE SITUATION

He was right. It made sense. To dream is okay but this world is run by Vitamin M (Money). I can’t be carefree and leave it all on luck to succeed in any or both of the streams. I’ll have to plan it out, be methodical, practical in my approach.

Neglecting the business side of things isn’t going to help me grow. Even if I do go on to become a successful actor cum blogger, I’ll have to still learn the art of making money from money. To expand my finances.

Can’t just be depositing money and not knowing how to build from it & how to have a stable source of income.

You, me – we are all here to succeed. No one plans to fail. We put in our best but it’s our hard work combined with a little bit of “being at the right place at the right time” that ultimately leads to success.

But success in the choice of our stream isn’t guaranteed. I’m an eternal optimist but just playing the devil’s advocate here. So we’ll have to consider our available options and make the best use of them to help us do – what we ultimately want to do.

Photo ©Priyanka Panjwani

I, therefore, have decided to have a crack at understanding Dad’s business and realize my responsibility while continuing to blog, travel & act.

To ultimately get into business or not, or to manage multiple things is my choice but what’s the harm in understanding the skill of business?

It’s going to hold me in good stead irrespective of the choice of my stream. I can apply it to travel to monetise or market my blog or can apply it to acting to sell my skills – USP (Unique Selling Point) as they say or can even manage dad’s business side by side if I choose to, so that I can support my passion(s).

THE FINAL WORD

The choice between passion and responsibility doesn’t have to have one winner. I could commit to both so that at the end of the day I’m happy doing what I want to & also have fulfilled my responsibility.

I don’t have to then, live under the guilt of having killed the legacy my dad worked so hard to build from scratch.

Time management is going to be the key. I’ll have to let go of that occasional football or cricket match for the bigger goal. At least it ensures that I enjoy the matches to come in future.

In this day & age, with so many options available, getting lost is a possibility but with a stable head on our shoulders – you & I can fulfill our responsibility & pursue our passion.

We can have the best of both worlds- passion and responsibility.  They don’t have to be a roadblock in each other’s way. Both passion and responsibility can facilitate and support each other.

Let them be components that run a well-oiled machine – your Life. Ultimately, they’re a married couple – can’t stop bickering but can’t do without each other either!

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